So, as some of you know, I haven’t had internet up until Tuesday. Then I had an emergency later that day and Thursday was an important day for everyone, but me. So here I am on Friday, after a long drought. No need to talk about my life just yet, since I still need to post everything, so I’m probably going to…post everything. You know, just get it out the way. Then I’ll only have to worry about writing new things. So, without further ado, Adventures of Joeboben Pt.2…I guess that what I’ll call it to keep things simple, since a name was never created. Rereading this one, I realized that these writings have way too many references for the average reader. But, whatever. Maybe one day, someone will be able to catch some of these… (Original post date: 4-2-11)
It has been pretty rough lately. I mean, I’m actually tired of all the attention. Lately, people have been following me and calling out my name and sometimes even calling me other names just to show their love. ”Joeboben, come back here!” ”Haha, we’ve finally found you, Joeboben!” I don’t understand why they have to charge at me all at once, though. It was flattering at first, but it’s whatever now. I visited a new town yesterday. This one is actually a bit crowded, but at least no one knows who I am. Despite how much louder it is than what I am used to, I can easily call it…peacefully annoying.
There are some strange characters around here: people eating hotdogs with toppings other than ketchup and mustard, people apparently leaving their keys in their car, so they have to forcefully get in…usually by like breaking the window. I guess there’s no cheaper alternative in these parts. I helped a young man get back into his home; he apparently locked his keys inside and that window was the only available entrance. They also have a weird way to playing. Some guy took this lady’s bag and ran off, while the lady waves at him, while shouting obscenities. I’m not sure why she looks at me as if I stole something from her. I mean, I guess this place would be normal if these people were like criminals or something.
Probably the most normal person around here was a boy that was decently short and didn’t look malnourished at all. He had a baseball cap. a baseball bat leaned against his shoulder, a striped t-shirt, and was walking with some dog. There was no glove, so I guess they are going to play fetch instead. Some innate feeling told me to talk to this person and my instinct usually leads me in a quite choice direction. ”Yo, kid!” He glared at me as if he were about to blast me away with a psychic attack dubbed after his favorite activity. He then smiled and walked in my general direction. ”My name is Joeboben, I hail from…” He walks to the chicken stand behind me and demands them to make a chicken sandwich. The lady pulled a sandwich from inside her cart and an already prepared monstrosity smothered in barbecue sauce was presented to the boy. I don’t know how these places always know exactly what everyone wants ahead of time.
He later walks over to me, since I decided to waste a decent portion of my time standing in place, looks me up and down, then states that his name is Slade. ”That’s a pretty boss name.” I wanted to say that in my head, but nothing happens the way I want it to. ”You’re dressed funny…well not really funny, but just…plain.” He continues to stare while attempting to leave no trace of his midday lunch. He giggles in a sort of childish way and his entire demeanor changes. He notices my “tools” and asks what style I was trained in. ”Style? I don’t know any styles. I just consider myself, true.” Pedestrians stopped and decided to stare at me for a few moments before doubling their previous paces as if my repertoire magically spawned onto my back. ”So, you want to spar sometime?” I decided this guy could be a threat to my mad skills, so I response was of course, “Affirmative.”
Spending the next few days together, we caused a bit of havoc around the surrounding area. Authoritative figures quickly burned our faces into their minds and if they even thought we were around, they took action. It wasn’t like we were breaking the law or doing anything harmful, we were just…I guess…very disruptive because of our long, drawn out conversations that usually resulted in random, boisterous arguments. ”Officer, there’s a huge ruckus in the square…The topic you ask? Well, apparently, baseball bats aren’t in this season…” The rockets flared. Baseball bats were apparently totally in that season and they sent seemingly some of their best men to take care of us. “To be continued…”
Apparently, we distracted them from the real threats to society, so in order to end our reign of ruining their proud, sane city, they decided to separate us. Offering Slade an offer he couldn’t refuse, I was one, once again. I don’t understand why I didn’t receive the offer though, but whatever. I decided to travel elsewhere, so I waited until sunset and walked in the general direction of the sun. Despite the numerous amounts of sunrises I have romantically, but non-homoishly spent with Slade, I never once got that sparring session. Whatever though.